Dear Jack,
I don’t know what to do or what to say to my supposed friend. I had to euthanize my girl last week. I had no choice. Then my friend says to me, “I really don’t understand you. Your dog could have lived longer but you chose death. You complain that your dog is dead but your dog would still be alive if you’d made the choice to keep her!”
This is a most insensitive comment. All I can say is that this person either never had a pet or loved a pet --- or this person never learned the meaning of suffering. If they had known someone – four-legged or otherwise – who suffered in this life and sought relief from pain, they never would think this, much less say this, kind of thing. Until they suffer or witness someone who does, they will not understand. I’m sorry for your loss and I’m sorry you had to make the hardest decision ever. Remember, “It’s not putting me down, it’s lifting me up.” You absolutely did the right thing for your girl.
Love, Jack
It doesn’t matter what color you are, what language you speak, if you’re rich or if you’re poor, famous or obscure… grief is grief and love is love.
If you find yourself drowning in your grief, you must find support. The right people will lift you up: people who are sensitive and who understand. This may include family, friends, clergy, specialized group support…the right books by your bed…your other pet, if you have one. It is very easy to isolate yourself at a time like this. You may need your space but please stay connected to the ones who make you feel better just by having them around you. You need support now more than ever.
This is one of the reasons pets don't live as long as you do. We are gifts for you not only because we love you but because every time you say goodbye to one of us, you grow.
It's all by Design. We come and we go. You will one day leave this planet too. By the time you do, you hopefully will have learned what you need to learn. Your load will be light and you will be ready to fly. That final trip over the Rainbow, into Heaven or Paradise (however you define the afterlife) is what it's all about.
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