Dear Jack,
I was just wondering if anyone else experiences moments of dread or a sinking feeling in their chest, and how do you overcome that feeling? I never had these feelings before my girl passed and am not quite sure what they are or what they mean.
When a loss happens, you can feel you have no control – the loss pulls your spirits down with sadness and grief. It’s that sinking feeling. It pulls your personal energy downward and that is what you are feeling. Most if not all people feel this way when they experience great loss. These times are ironically designed to make you strong because you have to climb up out of the abyss to get to the light again and it is the climbing out of it that makes you stronger. It’s amazing how weak you can feel when you are really getting stronger. Don’t give up. What you’re feeling is normal. You will heal. Everything’s going to be okay.
Love, Jack
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About this letter
This letter is part of Jack McAfghan: Letters From Rainbow Bridge. A reader asks whether anyone else experiences moments of dread or a sinking feeling in their chest after losing their girl, and how to overcome it. Jack's reply explains the feeling and offers reassurance.
What Jack says about the sinking feeling
Jack describes the feeling as the way loss makes us feel we have no control, pulling our spirits and personal energy downward. He says most people feel this way after a great loss, that it is normal, and that climbing out of the abyss is part of what makes us stronger. His message to the reader is not to give up, because they will heal.
When grief shows up in your body
Grief can show up physically, as tightness in the chest, tiredness, disrupted sleep or a heavy feeling. These are common reactions to loss. Gentle movement, regular meals and rest can help, and if the feelings are intense or you have any physical symptoms that worry you, please talk to a doctor or counselor.
