Dear Jack,
My doctor got tired of listening to me grieve so she put me on an antidepressant, which is okay, but I worry that I am drinking too much now too. Sleeping too much. I don’t feel in “balance” and I’m not sure what to do. I just know I don’t feel in control of myself.
They say you can run but you can’t hide. You can try but wherever you go, there you are. It’s true. Addictions and other superficial and temporary solutions might dull your pain for a while but they can hurt you in the long run. The irony is that you are seeking escape from the pain rather than focusing on the loss itself. To shrink away from the experience of loss, to seek escape from the growth, will have consequences. What you are running from will still be waiting for you on the other side of it. The hard times are designed to force your growth and if you run away and hide, growth will continue to seek you out. I know it’s very hard, but do try to embrace the struggle and work your way to peace.
Physicians can be quick to prescribe drugs for depression related to grief. What these drugs tend to do is to deaden the emotions, to dull the feelings associated with loss. In the short run they bring relief because they take the edge off your emotions. In the long run they buy you time to heal, but very slowly. As you know, balance in all is the key.
The most important thing for you to do now is to raise your vibration. Eat healthy, exercise and find meaningful purpose. Surround yourself with positive, supportive people. The higher your vibration, the healthier you will be – emotionally, physically and spiritually. If you want to receive signs from your best friend, raise your vibration to be closer to theirs (the vibration of Love Itself) and you will soon see the miracles take place in your life. Keep the faith.
Love, Jack
It’s very difficult to do, but you must make a conscious effort to stay out of the dark places in your mind. There are so many! They can be found around every corner! It always helped Kate to put her hands on top of her heart. The weight soothes and helps to direct one’s thoughts to the heart and away from the madness of the mind. Put your hands upon your heart and feel us there. Close your eyes. Listen to the truth. Tear down the walls built of your grief and disbelief and build up your faith. You will come to realize that we are with you. We are always there. The day you learn this you will never be lonely again.
Know that it is your nature to heal, and heal you will. You will come out of this stronger. You will not only be whole when you heal, you will be more than you ever were before. You can’t see it yet, but it is one of the gifts we give to you.
You changed by loving me.
You grew by losing me.
You became strong by having faith in me.
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